All of Srila Prabhupada’s books come directly from Krishna

Bonds of Love: Devaki Devi Dasi 1974 was a trying year in Devaki’s life. Emotionally suffering to the point she couldn’t even eat, she understood there was no happiness in this world and was looking for spiritual truth. One day she became so miserable she couldn’t take it anymore. She left her 6-month old baby with her grandmother while she and her husband drove from Augusta to Atlanta, Georgia.

It sounds crazy, but we were going to be gone for a day or two to visit all the spiritual groups in Atlanta – 3HO, Kundalini, Hare Krishna – until I found the truth. On the way we talked about these different groups and I decided, “Hey, we have to go to the Krishna temple first.” When we got to the Atlanta temple I couldn’t leave. I had no idea why, but as soon as I walked in I felt that we didn’t have to go anywhere else. I couldn’t even go back to Augusta to get my baby, so while I stayed at the temple, the temple commander, Gokularanjana, and my husband went and brought my baby back.

Srila Prabhupada was coming in a week. I said, “Wow, who’s Srila Prabhupada?” The devotees were telling me, and we stayed up for three nights straight preparing Srila Prabhupada’s vyasasana and sewing, but I wasn’t learning how to do anything. They told me, “You need to offer your obeisances to Srila Prabhupada when he comes.” I said, “Yeah, but there’s no time for me to learn the prayers. Somebody has to teach me.” They said, “Well, it’s OK, just put your head down and say ‘Hare Krishna.’ We’ll teach you later.” We had so much to do to get ready.

At the airport I wanted to say the prayers everybody else was saying, but I didn’t know them.

When Srila Prabhupada came I put my head to the floor and – this has never happened before – a big force came through my brain, my mouth opened and closed, and I said, nama om visnu- padaya krsna-presthaya bhu-tale … I had no idea what I was saying, but I felt beautiful and wonderful and had chills all over my body. I looked up and Prabhupada was looking in my direction. I thought, “What!” That was my first connection. Later I had to learn the prayers word for word because I didn’t know them.

A few days later I really wanted to hear Srila Prabhupada’s class, but I had a high fever and

couldn’t get up. I was looking at the Lord Sesa Naga picture on the wall and suddenly I had no fever. I had so much energy that I ran to the temple, heard class while my baby slept, and afterward headed back to my room. There, within a few minutes, my fever raged and again I couldn’t move. I can’t explain this from a material viewpoint. I knew Prabhupada is not from here but is from someplace where I want to go. Within the year Srila Prabhupada had initiated me.

I realized Krishna talks to Srila Prabhupada, and Srila Prabhupada does absolutely nothing without Lord Krishna’s sanction. All of Srila Prabhupada’s books come directly from Krishna.

They contain Krishna’s words. When Srila Prabhupada read his own books, he would become ecstatic because he was reading Krishna’s words. He never thought the books were his.

Since 1975, in my heart all I’ve wanted is to know what Srila Prabhupada wants me to do, to do that, and to try to remember Krishna. But throughout the years, despite trying to follow and chanting my rounds every day, I became so fallen and felt so inadequate and insincere. On Prabhupada’s disappearance day celebration one year, I just knew Srila Prabhupada must have abandoned me and withdrawn his mercy. Then I looked up, and someone threw one of Srila Prabhupada’s garlands at me. It hit me in the face like a bullet. I cried and cried. I still have that garland. I realized Srila Prabhupada’s mercy will always be there, and all I have to do is pick myself up and keep going.

My conclusion is that we should simply chant Hare Krishna, follow the principles, do some service, and delve deeper into Srila Prabhupada’s books. If we can do that, Srila Prabhupada will be there for us. As long as we’re trying, Srila Prabhupada is there.